The Triad Relationship

I realized recently that I've blogged many times about how successful my polyamorous lifestyle has been, but have never written about the positive relationships. It's time to start, right now. I'm going to tell you about my most unconventional relationship thus far -- the triad.

For the first few years of my relationship with Aaron, I was super-insecure. It was awful. Have you ever met one of those girlfriends who views every other woman as a threat? Yep...that was me. Not a good place to be. But over time, and with much affection and support from Aaron, I began to relax a bit. It was becoming clear that Aaron and I were not only best friends, but life partners as well. We became polyamorous.

I should point out that I'm bisexual, and that, in the past, I had many times thought about having a three-way relationship with Aaron and another lady. But I never thought we would find a girl we were both attracted to who not only felt the same about us, but was also laid-back and interested in what we could offer. I mean, really, what were the odds of finding that perfect match? So the triad idea floated in and out of my mind, more a fantasy than a realistic goal.

Then we met Tara.

It was a Saturday and she was at the mall, giving away balloons to advertise the store where she worked. She ran up to Aaron and handed him a balloon, telling him she loved his Penny Arcade shirt. She was beautiful. Aaron thanked her and as we were walking away together, he had a big smile on his face. "You should give her your number!" I said. He hesitated for a moment -- surprised, I think, at my enthusiasm. A couple of minutes later, he had his number written down on a scrap of paper and ran back to her. When he returned to me, he was still smiling.

She called him only a couple of days later. They got together several times and a casual relationship formed between them. Aaron would come home and tell me about their adventures, and a lot about her. I was quite curious. After all, I'd only seen her that one time at the mall, and she and I hadn't even talked. And though I was very attracted to her, I had no way of knowing if she was bisexual herself...short of asking her, of course, but damn it, that kind of thing takes guts that I don't have yet.

One day Aaron came home after hanging out with her and said, "It came up in conversation today that you're bisexual, and Tara got really excited." (OH MY GOSH!!) I immediately asked if the three of us could hang out together soon. Not long after, a date was set.

We met her in the downtown area of where we were living at the time. She was dressed in one of the craziest outfits I'd ever seen -- a thick black shirt that looked like a straight-jacket undone, matching black pants and clunky black boots. I suppose the strangest thing about it was the fact that the temperature that day had to have been at least 75 degrees. But hey, it was her style and I was fascinated. Nay -- smitten!

Over the next year, the three of us had wonderful times together. We would spend a night at her place sometimes, and quite often, she would spend several days with us at our apartment. We grew to love each other very much. I liked calling us a "sexy, cozy family". We'd go out to dinner, explore San Francisco, watch movies, etc...everything that people in relationships do together. The mood was always very relaxed because Tara was always very relaxed -- she was a free spirit with no expectations.

She eventually went her own way and moved up to the city to try a different style of living. She is now in a happy, monogamous relationship with a very sweet man who thinks of world of her. We don't talk to Tara very often anymore, but we'll always be friends, without question.

And I look back on our time together as one of the best years of my life.